I was all set to finally watch Mary Queen of Scots for my next review, but Netflix had other plans. Right there on my home screen was "Carry-On (2024)", a shiny new Christmas action thriller boasting a solid cast: Theo Rossi (Sons of Anarchy), Dean Norris (Breaking Bad), and Jason Bateman (Ozark). Also the first movie to be released by Amblin Entertainment under their new deal with Netflix. Against my better judgment, I decided to give it a shot. What could go wrong with these names attached? Well, the answer is, as it turns out, quite a bit. Here's the review I wish I didn't have to write.
A Plot as Thin as Wrapping Paper
The premise is pretty simple: A desperate airline worker gets blackmailed into smuggling a mystery package onto a Christmas Day flight. The setup's fine for a popcorn flick, but the script handles its suspense like it's trying to build IKEA furniture without instructions. By the time the first act wrapped up, I already had the ending figured out. It's one thing for a movie to drop hints for an attentive audience, but Carry-On practically shouts, "Here's what's going to happen! " from the control tower. Any twists seem less clever reveals and more like some poorly timed gift exchange where you already know exactly what is in the box.
Christmas Action: Still Die Hard's Territory
This movie clearly wants a slice of that Christmas-action pie known as Die Hard. Unfortunately, Carry-On doesn't do anything particularly new except laden it with holiday clichés and some awkwardly shoehorned Christmas music. Speaking of which, I learned something new: Bruce Springsteen once covered "Santa Claus Is Coming to Town." It plays during the intro scene, but the only suspense I felt during the whole movie was wondering why they chose that version. All in all, Carry-On lacks the charisma, charm, and tension that make Die Hard the reigning champ of this genre. Yippee-ki-no, thank you.
Jason Bateman: The Film's (Only) Carry-On Item Worth Keeping
Amidst the chaos, Jason Bateman is an awesomely chilly villain masterminding this festive mess. Best known for his go-to typecast as the smart-ass good guy, Bateman fully commits to his dark side here, and it pays off. Measured and calculating, his performance easily forms the highlight of the film. It feels like he is in a far superior movie. If there's one takeaway, it's that Bateman needs more villain roles in the future. Just… not in sequels to this.
The Rest of the Cast: Wasted on Layover
Theo Rossi does his best with what little he's given as a protagonist, but he's written with all the depth of a holiday gift card. Dean Norris has a few scenes as a gruff airport authority figure, but they feel more like a cameo than a real role. The supporting cast flits in and out like passengers on a delayed flight, adding nothing memorable to the story. It's a shame because these are talented actors whom I appreciate a lot, and it's hard not to imagine what they could have done with a better script.
Gate-Check This One
Carry-On is not an unmitigated disaster, but neither is it a smooth ride. A predictable plot, underwhelming action, and missed opportunities with its talented cast make this a forgettable addition to the Christmas action genre. Jason Bateman does deserve credit for elevating his scenes, but even his performance can't carry this film to its destination. If one is in the mood for a holiday action movie, then one should stick with the classics. This one does not even make it to the runway. Carry-On(ly if you must.)